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- I'm Exhausted from Cancer...
This week has been rough
If you follow me on Instagram (which you should @hiamandabutler) you probably saw my story posts about my struggle with cancer this week. The last few weeks have been completely exhausting, emotionally and physically. I’ve been living in my head a bit and have been triggered from some events around me that quickly reminded me that I am still fighting cancer.
I was also consumed by the fact that my experience with cancer has been “easier” than others who have received more serious diagnosis’ and the guilt around surviving. It’s a weird feeling to feel grateful and guilty at the same time.
Cancer is all consuming. It comes in like a thief in the night and steals any type of normalcy, identity and health right before your eyes. And the sad part is that this happens over and over again without your consent. The moment we have a glimmer of hope, the cancer rollercoaster descends for another loop. I know you understand.
If you are lucky enough to emerge from treatment, then the identity crisis of, “Who am I?” “Where do I fit in?” “What was the meaning of all of this?”, creeps in. And those questions sometimes hit the hardest.
I just want to say, if you are feeling this, you aren’t alone. Most times the answer is never in front of us but takes years to reveal. The lessons in all of this may be hidden for now, but not for long.
This week was a week of releasing. Allowing myself to feel everything, cry and scream out everything, be pissed at the world for any and everything - and I let it all happen. These days are necessary in order for us to pick up the pieces and carry on fighting. We can’t be soldiers 24/7 when our insides are crying out for help.
I will leave my story posts here and I hope my words allow you to feel seen. We are sadly the only club in the world who understands this, but I am grateful we at least have each other.
🍋PRODUCT OF THE WEEK🍋
If you are post-treatment and looking to add something to help with hair regrowth, try Vegamour. I am only on month 1 but this was recommended to me by a friend. There are a ton of hair regrowth options so I’m hoping this localized serum will speed up the regrowth process.
💪🏽WELLNESS TIP OF THE WEEK💪🏽
REST REST REST
The holidays are an emotional time. Make sure you carve out time for yourself to recharge and breathe. If you are in a stressful environment or feel overwhelmed, remember to come back to your breath. Try Box Breathing - Inhale for 4, Hold for 4, Exhale for 4, Hold for 4 and repeat. Get as much rest as you can and enjoy doing nothing over the next week.
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
🎵TREATMENT SONG OF THE WEEK🎵
🗓UPCOMING EVENTS🗓
🌟WED DEC 27 5:30pm PST: BI-WEEKLY CANCER BADDIES CALL
What other events/offerings would you like to have? Send me an email!
Going through chemo soon and unsure of what to expect? Well GOOD NEWS, I wrote a book just for you! I shared all the in’s and out’s of chemotherapy: what to expect, side effects, all things cold capping (and where to get a scholarship), egg freezing, and all the mindset tools to help you on your cancer journey. Get my interactive color PDF HERE or the Amazon Kindle version HERE.